The First Shot

We all know golfers are mentally and physically weak, which is why the first shot of the day has most of you peeing down your legs. Because omg if I don't hit the first shot well I might have to take a drop and then I might take a double bogey instead of my regular double bogey without a drop and then the no one watching me besides the jackdicks in my group might say something a little mean, but WTF do I care, they're not Tiger Woods, this isn't Augusta, and JFC, we have beer in the cart, so how could I possibly take something this seriously if I can--and do--drink heavily while I'm doing it. Anyway, for you foppish dandies that still need some way to steel your nerves before teeing off on 1, do the golfing things Cory and pro Jared Wolfe tell you to here: